Edward to Bella is like me to Krispy Kreme

I am watching Twilight again. I am watching the kiss scene and I started thinking about a discussion that Edward and Bella have in Breaking Dawn. She asked if he missed her being human and he asked her to remember the "smell" of the hikers she wanted to attack in the forest. He said, "would you want to kiss that?"
So I have that in my mind while I am watching the kiss scene. Being overly analytical as I am, I was trying to think of a proper analogy...this is what I came up with:
Edwards feelings vs hardship towards Bella would be the equivalent of me falling deeply in love with a creme filled Krispy Kreme donut. And I am sorry but I would eat that fucker. I may regret it immediately and miss it, but I would savor the taste and blog my memories of it so I could suffer much angst later.
My self control is excellent. As long as I don't expose myself to the object of my lust. I don't go to Krispy Kreme because I know I have a problem with it. But my self control is not good enough to sit in the room with the donut and deny myself.

Another thing that I have thought a number of times about this kiss scene...I can get Bella's control in not jumping Edward's bones up until the bedroom scene. I mean he has told her that he cannot stay away from her but he hasn't made a physical move on her yet. I get that.
Once the kiss happened, and he threw her back on that bed....when he flew across that room backward, I would have reminded him of a spider monkey. I would be on him like a sticky booger! I started laughing just think about him trying to shuck me like a bad pair of hose.

I would have tortured this man! The end result, I would have never survived the first book. He would have finished me off. I would not have allowed him any room to practice his self control. At the very least he would not have been a virgin, at medium I would be a horribly scarred vampire from the many bites I would have encouraged during that elicit encounter, at worst it would have been a bloody mess to rival the birth scene in Breaking Dawn. I think I would have been fine with what ever the result...you gotta have fun, right?

My Rob obsession. I have no urge to meet Rob in person. I have too much respect for him to subject him to my obsession. I hope he is having lots of sex and turning down blow jobs at every opportunity simply because his stamina is waning.
I enjoy my raunchy chatter with other adult Twilight obsessed women. It is fun to fantasize about all the things we would do. But the bottom line is, Rob will never have to turn me down because I simply would not put him or myself through that lol.

New Moon
The book kills me. It depresses me. I hate that Edward leaves her. I don't give a shit why he left, I resent the hell out of the fact that he goes. I think Bella let's him off way too easy when he comes back. I get that deep love she has for him, but that would have been a hell of a bargaining chip that I would have used to the fullest.
That said, I was kinda dreading the movie. I knew it would be depressing.
But even if it was bad I knew that I couldn't avoid it. I love these characters too much to miss an opportunity to see them acted out.
I think Chris did a shitty job with the movie. I know many have raved over his work.
I like him. I think he is a hell of a guy, but I really did not like what he did with New Moon. Even though the story line is depressing and I was not looking forward to experiencing it, I am pissed that the vampires in New Moon were not attractive. The make up, hair and dress were appalling.
These are supposed to be exceptionally beautiful creatures in the eyes of humans.
They were pasty with eyes that would freak you the fuck out. It was like they gave up on trying to blend in.
I thought Kristen Stewart did a hell of a job in the movie. I thought Rob sucked. His only convincing scene was in Italy after the reunion scene.
None of his emotions were convincing....there simply was not enough time to let you really feel any of his emotions. It was like watching pieced together clips.
When I read the break up scene in the book, I could feel his pain as well as hers when he was cutting her loose. In the movie he just looked like a douche.
The way he dressed in the movie was inexcusable. I have heard it said that because he came from a time where men tended to dress formally that he would likely don a suit as a casual means of dress. But, hello! he is still trying to pass as a fucking teen!
Oh, and random critic point...what was with that fucking pizza slice toss...stupid!
Another random critic point...the music that played when Bella is in the floor with blood on her arm and everyone is looking at her like...well...fat people look at a Krispy Kreme donut. It made me think of the music played in bad 70's horror flicks with giant insect in it. I recall a movie with giant ants and I swear that weird music was played in that movie.
Even bad Twilight saga is better than no saga so I will continue to watch New Moon over and over and I will buy the DVD. I will enjoy the "months" scene, the "Victoria/Harry/Bella diving scene, Charlie's scenes, Bella/Jake "it's killing me, it kills me" scene and seeing Edward fighting/getting his ass kicked.
After Twilight, Eclipse is my other favorite book. I am scared shitless that David is going to make Eclipse more of an action flick trying to draw in some more bucks from the guys. Fuck the guys, these are chic flicks, leave them be!
That tent scene better rock my world, that leg hitch better make my ovaries twitch and I want my playful leech/dog banter throughout the movie!

I have no fucking idea how they would ever bring Breaking Dawn to the big screen.
I almost want them to just start it off with Bella already being a vampire. I do want to see her in all her glory after the change. I want some scenes to see her all dolled up and full of vampy goodness.

No matter what I will follow through to the bitter end because I love this series.
I do appreciate the hard work that went into getting it onto screen.
I have developed a new love for Rosalee that I didn't feel in the books just because I have fallen in love with Nikki. I love watching her in interviews.

The greatest thing that I have gotten out of the Twilight Saga movies is finding Robert Pattinson. I will have to buy a back up copy of Remember Me because I will wear the damned thing thin watching it. I have watched everything available that he has done. Although I just skipped around thru Rings of the Nebulungs once I found out they dubbed his voice...and thank God, cause it really sucked. But everything else he was in I loved. He is fucking awesome and the most gorgeous man I have ever seen.

Damn, this is long enough to be called a novelette. No one has ever accused me of being brief. I think I got it all out though...for now :)